Chuck vs Emotions
by Shrimpy Kay
Summary: Chuck is trying to figure out his life with Sarah while his life continues. Chuck/Sarah.
1. Confrontations

disclaimer: don't own chuck or any of the characters

I think my writing here is better than in The New Kids. I love Chuck and I can't wait until the last two episodes are on this Thursday.

Hope you like it

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"Chuck, this is an emergency!" Morgan exclaimed nervously.

Chuck snapped out of his daydreaming. "Emergency?" he asked alarmed.

"Yeah, it's Anna-" Chuck relaxed a little. "It's our anniversary and I don't know what to get her! I'm not much for that kinda stuff, Chuckles-"

"Please don't call me that," Chuck broke in.

"Sorry-Chuck," Morgan corrected. "But I heard from Jeff who learned from Lester who got it from Max who found out that she's getting me something and I can't show up empty-handed, buddy."

"Jewelry, maybe?" his best friend suggested.

"Jewelry, yeah, great idea," Morgan mumbled as her walked away from the front desk. Chuck was left along to return to his thoughts.

It was Sarah. She was always sending mixed signals. Chuck leaned back in his chair and rested his head on his hands. First she acted like she liked him, but then she said she didn't with the truth serum. 'And then she kissed me,' Chuck thought. But wait-she said she didn't like him then she kissed him? Was it possible that Sarah had been lying? It was impossible, he argued with himself. She hadn't taken the antidote yet-Sarah _had_ to tell the truth. And then the thing with Bryce. This was getting too complicated.

"Not very attentive today, are we?" Chuck's thoughts were once again scattered-but this time by Casey.

"Waa?" Chuck snapped forward in his seat.

"You had a blank look on your face."

"Oh. Just thinking."

Casey grunted. "Well, when you decide to stop 'thinking', tell your sister I can't make it for dinner tonight."

"Shame," Chuck said dryly.

"Watch it, Bartowski. Just because we're in a store crowded with a bunch of other people doesn't mean-"

"Excuse me, Casey," Chuck said suddenly. He had seen Sarah walking outside in her Weinerlicious outfit. "I have to go." The curly haired employee walked out the door and across the street and over to Sarah by the tables.

"Hey Sarah."

"Hi Chuck. Is something-wrong?"

"No, I was just wondering if we could talk."

"Okay." The two sat down at the nearest table. "So Chuck, what's up?"

The brunette clenched his hands together on the table (which Sarah knew meant he was nervous, although she didn't mention it). "It's just-our Cover, Sarah. I thought it over and-it's just too hard for me, y'know? I mean, I know our cover is friends but even on missions-I can't do the boyfriend girlfriend thing."

Sarah put her hands on Chuck's clenched ones. "I understand," she said.

Was that a look of concern on her face? Chuck wondered. Damnit, he could never read facial expressions. Anyway, if there had been a look, it was gone a second later, being replaced with a blank one. Chuck finally realized that Sarah's hand was on his. Her soft, warm hand. Maybe she really did care…

No, he corrected himself. Once again, the slightest touch from her made him re-think every word he said, every move he made. Chuck moved his hands away. "I have to get back." He got up and walked away towards the Buy More. He didn't know that Sarah was watching him from behind, a look of sadness plastered on her face.

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So? How was it? Please review and be brutally honest 


	2. Menza

I know that the first two chapters are short but I promise the third will be longer.

Disclaimer: don't own characters or show

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"Let's get right to the point," General Beckman said as Chuck walked into the home theatre room. "There's a weapons dealer who we believe is going to make an appearance this Friday night at the concert in the park."

"And we're going to have to find him, right?" Chuck asked.

"Exactly," General Beckman replied. "He goes by the name Menza."

The room disappeared. A flower. Dog, bomb, man, pyramid, baby. Chuck quickly ran through what he had seen. "Menza. Steals weapons then sells them through the black market. Something with the name Deca and a big, black gun." Chuck looked General Beckman in the eyes. "He's going to try and sell the Deca thing."

Sarah's eyes grew wider. "How did he get it?"

"What, get what?" Chuck asked. "I think I'm missing something here."

'Deca," Beckman explained. "Is a new weapon the NSA is working on. Highly classified."

"So how did he get it?"

"Well if we knew that this would be a lot easier," Casey replied. "Guess we'll have to be careful. Stay in the car this time, Bartowski. I mean it."

"Actually," Beckman intervened. "We'll need Chuck on this mission to find out more about Menza. Our profile on him is very limited. Sarah, Chuck, you'll be going as a couple. Casey-"

"Actually," Chuck interrupted. "I was, uh-thinking. Maybe me and Sarah should go as…sister and brother?"

"Is something wrong?" Beckman asked.

"No," Sarah covered for her 'friend'. "It's a good idea. Some people have heard of Chuck and Sarah as a couple, but never as siblings. It will help in the case I get taken."

Beckman studied them. "Fine. Which name will you be taking?"

"Bartowski," Sarah said automatically.

Casey grunted. Chuck noted that it was number three-amused with a side of 'I can use this against you later.' "Okay, Sarah _Bartowski_. And I am?"

"Just a civilian enjoying the concert," Beckman replied. "Now remember, this is a dangerous man. Be careful."

And with that the screen went black.

Sarah stood leaning against the couch with her arms crossed while Chuck sat on it.

"Okay," Casey said after a minute. "_I'll_ leave." The other two watched as he walked out the door.

Chuck and Sarah sat (well, for Sarah-leaned) in silence for a few moments until the intersect broke it.

"Thanks," Chuck said.

"No problem," Sarah had a hard time looking him in the face, so she stared at the blank television screen. "I understand why-" she broke off, and the room was once again was filled with silence.

"Sarah," Chuck asked suddenly. "Does a CIA agent-do they have to everything to gain someone's trust? Like for a mission?"

"Well, yes, Chuck. Anything that is necessary to help the mission succeed."

"But what if it's not to help the mission succeed directly?"

"What do you mean?"

"Nevermind." He stood up. "I'll see you tomorrow, then. At the concert."

"Yeah." Sarah smiled. "See you there."

"Don't forget. Dinner with Ellie and Awesome next week. They've really grown on you."

The words echoed in Sarah's head. 'They've really grown on you.' This was the exact opposite of what she should be doing. Getting attached to Chuck, his friends and family. It could even get her killed someday. But it was impossible not to do so. Even Casey had softened up a bit.

They departed and as Chuck drove home, he though about their conversation. Anything to gain someone's trust. Chuck pulled into a parking spot but didn't leave his car. It all made sense. Everything was just so he would trust Sarah. He would listen to her, and wouldn't die, so she wouldn't get in trouble.

Chuck rested his head on the steering wheel. Sarah had never liked him-it was all a trick.

And yet he still could never stop thinking about her. Blonde, beautiful Sarah.

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I promise the 3rd chap. will be longer but I hope that you like it so far (you can also tell me what you think. click the review button) 


	3. Concert in the Park

disclaimer: don't own Chuck or any of the characters

About the Griffith Park thing, I've never been to LA so I have no idea what it looks like i just know that it's a park and by looking at a few pictures of it, it looked like a nice place to have a concert.

Thanks for the reviews

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"Are you ready Chuck?" Sarah asked, her blonde hair flowing in the wind. They were standing at the edge of an open field at Griffith Park. "You know the plan?"

"Mhm. Don't die."

A smile escaped her lips. "You're just here to enjoy the concert with a few thousand other people. All you have to do is tell me if you flash."

"Got it."

"Casey is already there." Sarah took Chuck's hand, and he cleared his throat awkwardly. Sarah realized what she had done and quickly dropped his hand. "Sorry, I just kinda got used to that as our cover."

"It's fine-sis."

As they neared the area with the stage, the two could hear jazz music playing, and walked to the top of a hill, where they could survey the area.

Chuck shrugged. "Pretty good music, but I don't really like that jazz stuff."

"Me either," Sarah agreed.

"Ready to see my horrific dance moves?"

"You're not _that_ bad of a dancer."

"Oh yeah?" Chuck started swaying to the music. "Am I killing you yet?"

Sarah laughed. "Not yet."

"Well I guess I'll have to try harder. Right, sis?" Chuck enjoyed their cover as brother and sister a lot more than as a couple, even though no one was around listening to them. There was less rules, like how he would have to hold Sarah's hand, causing an uncomfortable moment. Plus, now he could goof off, like he and Ellie did.

"Right," Sarah said.

"Just because you're the only Bartowski who can dance doesn't mean anything."

"Yeah, it means I can dance," she teased.

"Am I interrupting?" Casey's voice interrupted from Sarah's watch. "I wouldn't want you two to forget that we have a job to do."

Sarah became serious. "No. All clear?"

"Clear."

Chuck leaned against the tree on his left. It was no coincidence that Sarah had chosen the name Bartowski. It was to gain his trust and it had worked. One smile out of her made him forget everything.

All of a sudden his thoughts scattered as the song changed. Chuck stood there staring at the stage and the crowd of people around it with a blank look on his face. Without his usual grin, Sarah couldn't help more sad.

"Is something wrong?" She asked.

"It's nothing."

"Tell me. I'm your little sister."

Chuck looked at his feet. "Well, before-Mom left, she would always sing to me-every night the same song."

"This one."

"Yeah, and every night after tucking me in she would say, 'I love you charebear.' Although I'm not really sure where the name comes from. But you know how she always used to call me that."

Sarah nodded. "I really miss Mom. She used to call me her shining star."

Chuck was surprised. Sarah had just told him something about her personal life. Even though it was a tiny fact, it was still something. Sighing, he said, "Yeah. I miss Mom too." Chuck looked back at the crowd of people. Suddenly he saw an older man with graying hair and flashed.

Sarah noticed the look on his face of when he was flashing. "What did you see?"

Chuck brought his voice down to a whisper just in case anyone _was_ listening. "It's Menza. He's here planning to sell that Deca thing to an Arabian man. Except he knows."

"That…?"

"That the NSA is after him." Chuck looked around the crowd again and saw a man around the age of forty with a brown ponytail and flashed again. "Bomb! He's planning to bomb to concert in case we're here."

"Casey!" Sarah exclaimed into her watch. "Chuck, which one is he?"

"Grayish-brownish hair, thin, in his 50's or 60's, he's uh-kinda tall. Uh-he's, uh…" Then Chuck saw him. "Him! He's Menza!" the nervous Buy More employee said.

"Casey, we've got him. Come as soon as possible."

As soon as Sarah said this, they both felt two metal guns in their backs. Chuck broke out in cold sweat.

"Don't move," the figure said. "Or I shoot,"

Then everything went black.

Chuck opened his eyes but couldn't see anything. He tried to move but he was tied to something-a chair. After wriggling around a few times, he heard a voice.

"Try anything and I shoot both of you before you can utter a single word."

Chuck felt a hard object jammed against his chest. He tried to move his hands but they were tied to something soft and warm-Sarah's hands. Chuck's heart skipped a beat, even though he wanted to slap himself for it. Even though he could be shot at ay second, Chuck still thought of how he and Sarah were being forced to hold hands-in a way. Judging by her squirming, Sarah also had a gun pressed against her skin.  
Sarah was trying to think of a way out of this situation. It would be a lot easier if Chuck wasn't there. Whatever her plan was, it would have to be quick-somehow getting rid of two guns, getting Chuck out of the way, and grabbing a gun while simultaneously aiming it at two people. Most likely impossible.

"Where are we?" Chuck asked.

"Well, if I wanted you to know that you wouldn't be blindfolded now would you, dumbass."

"Guess not."

"I know the NSA if after me, but I won't need to worry in a few minutes times."

"Menza." The words escaped out of Chuck's mouth before he realized what he was doing.

"So I was right. Kill them."

Chuck closed his eyes and braced himself. Then he heard shots. "Am I dead?" he wondered aloud.

"That could be arranged, you know," Casey said as he removed Chuck's blindfold.

The tied-up man opened his eyes. "Casey! Thank god you-!"

"Shut up. He's still here somewhere."

Chuck did as he was told. Sarah slid a knife from her hand carefully and cut the rope.

"Somehow we always manage to live. Go team!" Chuck joked.

Both of his handlers remained silent and serious, guns now in hand.

"He's gone," Sarah said.

"Bomb," Chuck suddenly remembered.

"Oh shit!" Sarah exclaimed. She and Chuck ran in one direction while Casey went the other way.

"It's got to be here somewhere," Casey said through his watch.

"It's hard to find anything in the dark," Chuck said. "Especially since it the woods." Suddenly he tripped over something. "Sarah!" he cried out.

She turned around but he had already started to fall, and since he had grabbed onto her, Sarah lost her footing too. Chuck quickly grabbed her and pulled her close, putting his hands on her head and back so that she wouldn't get hurt. The two fell together, Sarah's head being cushioned by Chuck's chest.

In an instant, Sarah flashed back to when they had "Slept together" for their cover. She had always wondered what it would be like to rest on his chest. To feel safe and guarded for once, instead of always being on the run. Now she knew, and it was pretty damn comfortable. Sarah wanted to stay in that position, but they had a job to do.

They both scrambled up quickly and found out what they had tripped over.

"We found it," Sarah said into her watch.

Chuck examined the black sports bag that had caused him to trip-and for Sarah to fall on him. The last time he had ever really been in a position like that was with Jill, five years ago. He had forgotten what it was like to hold someone in his arms. Well, there was Ellie but that was his sister. Chuck snapped out of his thoughts, remembering that there was a bomb bound to explode soon. Opening the bag, he caught a glimpse of the box shaped explosive and flashed. The woods disappeared, being replaced with countless images. After his flash was over, Chuck gave out a yelp and dropped the Nike's bag.

"Too heavy, Bartowski?" Casey came out of a thicket of trees nearby.

"Small bomb, big boom."

"That would kind of make sense. Anything else?"

"Code," he gasped. "If you get any of the numbers wrong-even if you haven't finished entering it-it explodes."

"That makes this a little more complicated."

Sarah sat on the ground, studying the bomb. All it had was a timer and a keypad. The numbers read 30 seconds.

"Oh shit, oh shit" Chuck said when he saw the timer. He repeated this phrase over and over, head clutched in hands.

"Did you see any numbers?" Sarah asked exasperated.

"Numbers, uh…numbers." Whacking his head, Chuck tried to remember a set of numbers.

15 seconds.

"Come on, Bartowski, think!" Casey raised his voice.

"Well as you can probably tell I don't do well under pressure!"

Sarah got up and touched Chuck's arm lightly. "Just try and think," she said.

Chuck tensed when he felt someone touch his upper arm, but relaxed to see that it was Sarah. Somehow, her touch made him calm enough to remember the five-digit code.

"24622!" he exclaimed. Casey's lighting-like fingertips punched in the number and the clock stopped at 4 seconds.

Casey let out a sigh of relief and Sarah smiled. Chuck punched the air in triumph and let out a "Whoo!"

Casey let out another one of his famous grunts. "Nice concert."

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	4. A Day Off

Sorry for the wait. See, I wrote chapter 5 already, but I needed a chapter 4. Then after I had written both chapters, I realized that chapter 5 needed a major rewrite-and I'm having writer's block on that-so I'm sill working on it. Anyway, here's chapter 4:

* * *

Chuck shuffled into his room at about one in the morning. It had been a long night and he was definitely ready for bed. After changing into something suitable for sleep, he fell onto his bed and let sleep overcome him.

"How was it?" Ellie asked the next morning as Chuck shuffled into the kitchen.

"What?"

"The concert."

"Oh yeah…it was good. Nice to get out." Which was true, except for the almost dying part. Chuck didn't want to get into any more details-not that he really could, actually, without lying. What could he say? Oh yeah, me and Sarah were having lots of fun until some madman came along and decided he wants to bomb the concert in case there were people after him there-but it's okay because the Intersect in my head remembered the code to disarm it. Yeah, that would be a great answer, Chuck amused himself.

Excitement flashed on Ellie's face. "Well, are you back together yet?"

"No, Ellie," Chuck replied with an exasperated sigh.

"But it really looked like you two could have a good future together."

"I find that kind of hard to believe. We're just friends."

"What happened, Chuck? You were so excited about Sarah a few weeks ago. Even Lou agrees."

"You talked to Lou?"

"I was hungry and her shop was next door."

"Ellie…" Chuck began warningly.

"Anyway, what happened? Don't you like her?"

"Yeah, a lot. But-"

Ellie bit her lip before continuing. "Sarah's so great for you, Chuck. When you're with her, you're happier than I've seen you since Stanford."

Why'd she have to mention that? Chuck thought. Even though he now understood that he had been kicked out for his own safety, it still hurt. "Ellie, I-" he broke off, trying to think of a response. Maybe it looked like that when they were with Ellie, but usually when Chuck was with Sarah, he was debating every move he made, trying to see things from her point of view. He definitely didn't feel comfortable or happy then.

"I don't understand, Chuck. Usually I'd just let it go-you're a grown man after all-but I want you to be happy."

"I _am_ happy," he argued. "I've got great friends and the best sister ever."

His sister smiled. "I guess I can't change your mind then, huh?"

"Let's just say the chances of me and Sarah getting back together is slim." Changing the subject, Chuck added, "Oh and by the way Casey can't make it tomorrow night."

"Busy _again_? Oh and Chuck, you can call him John."

"I'd rather not."

"Well, one day I'm going to convince that man to clear up his schedule."

Chuck laughed at the determination in her voice. "I'm sure that will be easy," he said sarcastically.

"Are you working today?"

"No, I took the day off. I'm exhausted." At this, he yawned.

"What time did you get in last night?"

"The concert didn't end until midnight and traffic was horrible."

The front door opened and Captain Awesome walked in, his bike helmet oddly placed on his head. "Hey Chuckster, hey beautiful." He gave Ellie a kiss, and then turned towards Chuck. "Up a little late?"

"Late? It's seven o'clock!"

Awesome snapped the helmet buckle and took it off. "Always up at six-thirty for a morning bike ride."

"That's…nice."

_Ding_.

"Laundry's done," Ellie explained as she tossed Chuck a brown shirt. "Devon and I are going out for breakfast. We'll be back in an hour or so."

He nodded. Maybe he'd get some more sleep while they were gone.

"Oh and Chuck, is this yours?" She held up a brown jacket.

Chuck immediately recognized it as the one Sarah had worn when he first saw her at the Buy More. Everything was so simple then. He was a guy who worked at a store. Not much more than that. Now his life story included a beautiful blonde-yeah, that would be Sarah-plus some of the beating up the bad guys, almost getting killed a few thousand times…yeah that about summed it up.

"I gave it to the dry cleaners two days ago so it wouldn't get ruined in the wash," Ellie Bartowski continued. "But I forgot to ask you."

"No, it's actually Sarah's. She must have left it here a few days ago when she stopped by."

Understood incorrectly, Awesome gave Chuck an approving nod and held up his hand for a high-five. "Way to go, Chuck."

"Uh-no, not like that." But he felt himself getting red in the face anyway, just thinking about what Awesome had meant.

"Do you think you could drop it off, then?" Ellie asked.

Go over to Sarah's and drop off her jacket. It was a simple task but Chuck wasn't sure he could do it. He was working hard not to get caught up in that emotional rollercoaster, but whenever he saw those blue eyes that sparkled when Sarah was happy, or her smile, Chuck couldn't think straight and would happily jump off of a bridge if it would make her happy. That was the one thing he hated about himself. Always falling head over heels for the wrong girls.

"Chuck?" It was Ellie, bringing him back into reality. "I asked if you could drop Sara's jacket off."

He couldn't think of a way out of this, so Chuck reluctantly agreed and watched his sister and her boyfriend leave. After changing into his now clean brown shirt, fixing his unmanageable hair, and grabbing the keys, Chuck began to make his way over to Sarah's apartment.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

Sarah opened her eyes and groaned. She was debating whether or not to smash her alarm clock but decided against it-she was lucky that Chuck had gotten her another one. Instead, the blonde clicked the alarm setting to OFF and the beeping immediately stopped.

She didn't have work at the Weinerlicious on Saturdays, and the other type of work was starting to wear her out-plus she hadn't gotten back to her apartment until around 12:30 the past night-so Sarah had decided to sleep in. Unfortunately, the alarm had escaped her mind. She debated whether or not to go back to sleep-with no more interruptions-but once she woke up it was hard to go back to sleep. Maybe a warm bath would help her relax.

As soon as Sarah stepped into the tub, she knew it was the perfect thing for her right now. Warm water enveloped her body as she leaned back, closing her eyes. Last night had been tiring-she wasn't used to being in near death situations. Well, okay-that was a lie, but Sarah usually always had something up her sleeve. But with Chuck there was always the chance that he could get in the way or get hurt-don't even think about that, she warned herself. Actually, Sarah could only count three times when she actually had no plan. Once with Bryce in New Jersey-if backup had come any later, she probably wouldn't be alive right now-, the time with Chuck at the "bomb"-Sarah blushed thinking about that time. Kissing him had only been one thing. Amazing. Plus last night-bombs were not exactly her specialty and when the clock was ticking and one wrong move would kill them all, Sarah had felt truly helpless. Also, if it wasn't for Chuck, a lot of people at the concert would have been killed, too.

Somehow Sarah had remembered that if Chuck wasn't relaxed, he wouldn't be able to remember any codes, so she hadn't panicked-also because CIA training had taught her to do so-but instead tried to make Chuck feel comfortable.

Her thoughts wandered to the conversation the two had had a few days ago after the briefing. His question still puzzled her. Do you have to do anything to gain someone's trust…he probably meant-

Oh, shit. How had Sarah not understood? A first grader would have understood. He was talking about her-them, together. 'He probably hates me now,' she thought.

The spy side of her told Sarah it was for the best-she was getting too attached to the Intersect and his family. So attached that if it was between her mission and saving Chuck, she might choose the latter.

But this was _Chuck_, the rest of her brain argued. She had gotten so used to his goofy smile, deep brown eyes, and warm expression. Sarah hated to admit it, but her partner was becoming more important than the job. Quitting had _never_ entered her mind until now. It was hard to imagine life without the CIA-no danger, no action, no excitement-just a regular life.

She was getting a headache now, and the water was starting to cool down, so Sarah took some Advil, got into pajamas, and started watching TV.

Five minutes later the doorbell rang. Sarah threw a sweatshirt on and walked over to the door. Looking through the keyhole, she saw Chuck rubbing his neck awkwardly while holding onto a jacket-her jacket.

"Hey Sarah," he muttered as Sarah let him in. Chuck couldn't screw up this time, he couldn't get hypnotized by her smile or anything. But as he noticed the monkey pants, Chuck couldn't help but smile, amused. "Day off?"

Sarah nodded.

His smile disappeared. "You left your jacket at my house. Y'know, the one you wore when we first met. Well, I mean, you also wore it a few days ago too and you can probably tell what it is anyway." Chuck mumbled everything he said, moving his eyes from side to side but never resting his eyes on Sarah's face.

Sarah knew why now, of course. He didn't want to get caught up in another emotional rollercoaster, but it still hurt to see him not look her in the eyes like he usually did. "Thanks," she said as she took it. "I've been looking for it."

"So…any news on Menza?"

"Not yet. We haven't heard anything since last night but we're not anticipating him coming to us. There were no ID's taken-nothing that could connect to us."

"Well that's good-in a way." That's when Chuck noticed that the TV was on mute. "I shouldn't interrupt whatever you're watching."

"No, really, it's fine. I'm just spending the day relaxing."

Chuck nodded.

"Want to stay?" Damn, why had she said that? First of all, that would just be awkward, and second, getting extra attached to the Intersect wouldn't help at all when it was time to leave. As much as Sarah hated to think about it, there was definitely going to be a day when her time with Chuck would be over, and the more time she spent with him, the harder it would be to say goodbye.

"Actually," Chuck lied. "Ellie and I kinda have plans. I really should be going back." He rubbed his neck awkwardly again. "So I guess I'll see you…tomorrow, then."

"Yeah, tomorrow."

Chuck raised a hand in goodbye has he walked out the door. Sarah was glad he had said no, but as she watched him leaving, she had wanted him to turn around and say that yes, he was going to stay. It was obvious by the look on his face that the whole Chuck and Ellie hanging out thing was a complete lie.

Sarah layed back down in her bed and turned the TV volume up.

* * *


	5. Thank God For Cell Phones

First off, let me say that I'm very sorry for the time it's taken me to update. It's due to me being lazy, and my schedule. I started traveling for reunions and a class trip to Washington D.C., then I found out that I would be getting a Mac laptop, so I decided to wait until I got it.

Secondly, I know that at first there may be some questions about this chapter, but if they are not explained later in the chapter, then hopefully all of your possible questions will be answered in later chapters

* * *

Lunch break. One of the best times of the day, no one could argue with that. Chuck was eating a sandwich in Griffith Park, wearing his sunglasses due to the sunny weather (but hey, it's L.A.). Some people might have been afraid to return back to the place where they had almost been killed, but those places were now narrowing down for Chuck, so he didn't mind.

So far today had been a good day. There were no crazy customers who didn't realize that computers and liquid don't mix, no big jobs to do…it had been very quiet at the Buy More. Plus since tonight was the dinner with everyone including Sarah-Chuck had made it clear just as friends-he didn't have to stop anywhere after work and get dinner.

Which reminded him, he should go over some possible awkward situations that would most likely happen tonight- after all, everyone kept on asking Chuck why him and Sarah were over. He was sure that soon she or someone else would insist that they do for the cover, but for right now Chuck was content with not having to cuddle or hug her all the time and wonder if any of it was real.

As Chuck sat on the grass, he didn't notice the man with the large scar running across his face come up behind him. He also didn't see the gun that was currently in the man's hand. Before the Buy More employee knew what was going on, this man raised his gun and hit Chuck in the head.

He fell face-first into the grass, his head practically splitting open in pain. It was clear that the blow was meant to knock him unconscious. Sneaking a hand into his pocket, praying that whoever had attacked him wouldn't see, he dialed the first number that popped into his head-Sarah- and turned the volume down so that the assailant could not hear. All Chuck could do was pray that she would answer.

Pasteur, the man who had been sent to gather a Chuck Bartowski surveyed his work. Unfortunately, he was known for _killing_ people with his gun, not knocking them unconscious. But he was an employee who would soon have a very large amount of money, and he wasn't complaining. So he had struck softer, but apparently too soft. On the bright side, when Pasteur saw that his "victim" was still conscious, he remembered that he had been told to bring the mysteriously important man back _alive_, and he had always had a strong liking for seeing people in pain.

Chuck felt a sharp kick to his ribs and gasped. So the person had noticed he was not out cold. 'Please,' he thought. 'Sarah, please be there. I need you.'

Unluckily for him, Pasteur put his fist on the younger man's face and put pressure on, taking pleasure in the face that moan that escaped Chuck's lips. Now he would have to explain the blood to his employer, but honestly he didn't care. He was having too much fun. Kneeling down, the trained assassin whispered into Bartowski's ear.

"I could kill you right here," he said softly. Chuck felt a knife at his throat. "But I have orders to keep you alive."

"Who are you?" Chuck gasped. He was fighting the pain that still existed in his face and god, did he have a headache. He was hoping for somebody-anybody-to come and save him.

As a response, Chuck received another kick in the ribs and head before giving into the pain.

* * *

Sarah's phone rang as she was restocking the ketchup. She scowled, hoping it was not someone like Casey who was going to say something to ruin her day. When the blonde saw Chuck's face on her iphone, and involuntary smile cam to her lips.

"Hello?"

No one answered, but there was some ruffling around.

"Hello? Chuck?"

She heard someone being kicked, and a gasp.

"Chuck! Are you there?"

There were more muffles, followed by a moan.

"I'm taking a break!" Sarah yelled out and before anyone could tell her no, she was out the door. She had to get to Casey. Quickly. The faint sounds from the phone were still audible to her. "I could kill you right here, but I have orders to keep you alive." Sarah ran into the Buy More as fast as she could without flashing everyone around her (damn the Wienerlicious outfit). Luckily Casey was in sight. "Who are you?" It was from the phone, and Sarah recognized Chuck's voice. He was definitely in trouble.

"Casey!" she said in a strained whisper. He looked up at her.

"Walker, this is really not the-"

"Code yellow."

His gaze turned from irritated to alarmed as she held up the phone. There was the sound of even more muffles and two sharp kicks. They both ran to Casey's car and hopped inside, starting the engine and racing out of the Buy More parking lot much like in the movies.

Sarah kept looking out the window, trying to hide her worried face but was unsuccessful.

"Don't worry," Casey reminded her. "As long as he's wearing the watch, we can track him."

This did little to ease the CIA spy in the passenger seat. 'Please be okay,' she thought. 'I'm coming for you.' She desperately held the phone to her ear, hands shaking. She urged Chuck to say something-anything, even just a grunt- to let them know that he was okay. But nothing. Only the sounds of shuffling and then a dial tone.

"Chuck!" Sarah cried. She feared the worst.

Casey must have been thinking the same thing, because he said, "Either the phone has been found and Bartowski is in an even bigger mess, or the OFF button got pushed. Hope for the latter."

Her throat tightened. "Faster," she whispered.

"I'm already going 90 in a 25 mile zone. I'm surprised I haven't already hit some little kid on a tricycle."

Sarah slunk down in her seat and stared out the window, closing her eyes every few seconds so that no tears would escape. As they passed Griffith Park, she saw the Nerd Herd car and whispered his name.

"We're catching up," Casey grunted.

"How did they find him? Who has something against Chuck?"

"Menza, I'm guessing."

"But there's no way-"

"He must have friends in high places. Someone who could hack into the system and find out Chuck's name. Did you at any time two nights ago say anyone's name, or did he?"

That was when it hit her. "We shouldn't have used the name Bartowski. How could I be so stupid? We said Chuck's full name, if anyone had been paying close attention."

A minute or two went by before he spoke again. "It's that one."

Sarah looked. It was the only car on the very long road, a silver Mazda that was going much faster than the speed limit. "Go faster!" she exclaimed.

"You know the rules, Walker. 30 yards. Where'd you head lately? You can't let your girly feeling get in the way."

She knew he was right, she was letting her emotions get in the way of accomplishing the mission, but that didn't stop her from defending herself. "There's nothing-"

Casey scoffed. "Cut the crap. We both know you're in love with him. Don't think I didn't see the little goodbye on the roof."

Sarah narrowed her eyes. "Weren't you supposed to be chasing Lizzie?"

"I lost her but I was keeping my eyes and ears open."

She tried to think of a good response, but came out empty. She looked out the window, only seeing desert. "Where are we?"

"Don't know, but I think we've been sighted."

"How do you know?"

"There's a gun pointed out of the driver's seat."

A bullet whizzed past the car, only grazing one of the side mirrors. Casey cursed under his breath. "Hold on tight." With that he swerved the so that the two were side by side and rammed the vehicle next to them, on Sarah's side. The blast shattered the windows and sent out the airbags. Luckily Sarah had covered herself with her hands and only had some a few cuts and scratches, which she paid no attention to while jumping out of the car.

The Mazda's entire left side was caved in, and glass was everywhere. The crash jolted Chuck awake and as he realized that he was in the trunk of a car and that the pain he felt was real, he panicked. 'What was that crash?' When he remembered what had been done to him, the kidnapped man scrunched his face in pain. He didn't think he was hurt really badly, but he was wrong on a regular basis.

"Sarah…" he moaned, hoping that maybe, just maybe, she had picked up and was still on the line.

Sarah heard his voice calling her name as she ran towards the end of the car. She peeked inside and saw that he was not in the back seat, so that left the trunk. At first she thought it was her imagination, but no, there it was again. The agent went closer to the trunk. "Chuck? Can you hear me?"

No, it couldn't be her, but it was. Sarah had once again saved him. His head flashed in pain and Chuck groaned. "It hurts so bad. Sarah, please be there."

"Chuck, I'm here."

There was no response.

"I'll take the driver, you get Bartowski," Casey said from the other side of the car.

She tried opening the trunk, but it was locked. Sarah took out her lock picking kit and jammed it into the trunk keyhole. There was the click, and she opened the trunk. When she saw Chuck's situation, there was no way that she the blonde could possibly hide the emotion on her face. The trunk was small to begin with, especially since Chuck was extremely tall, but the crash and caved it in even more. He was crunched up, his eyes closed in pain. Plus there was blood all over his face. "Chuck…" Sarah whispered. "What did he do to you?"

His mouth was moving, but she couldn't hear him, so she bent down, her golden hair spilling on his face.

"Light…hurts…" he wheezed.

She covered his eyes with one hand and used the other to try and wipe some of the blood off of his face. Sarah stopped when his face contorted in pain at the slightest touch, so she resorted to running a hand through his hair. She loved his unruly, curly hair.

"Chuck, what did he do?"

"I don't think he likes me very much…someone hired him to get me…"

"How is he?" Casey asked, his head appearing at the top of the Mazda.

Sarah's face hardened as she stood up. "We need to get him to a hospital. Now."

* * *

Well?


	6. White Hospital

Here's chapter six. I'm still working on what happens next, this is about as far as I planned.

"Let's go over the story."

"Chuck and I were walking when two people came up to us and told us to give them our money. He told me to run and I didn't want to, but I did anyway. They mugged Chuck but didn't find his wallet, since it was in his car and we were just walking. I tripped-that's why I have the cuts and bruises-and realized how stupid it was that I ran away. I went back and he was there, in pain. I called an ambulance and everyone came, but you arrived first. And you just fell off of a ladder at the Buy More."

"And my car will be replaced within a few hours, like nothing ever happened."

Sarah and Casey were sitting in a white hospital lobby, in white chairs staring at the goddamn white walls while they talked. Sarah hated hospitals, especially waiting in them. When she was younger her father had died in one. Car crash. Ever since then she had hated hospitals and their stupid white-everything rooms. She fidgeted in her seat, waiting for Ellie, Awesome, and Morgan to arrive. Just moments ago the two agents had learned that Chuck would be fine-he was still unconscious now-with a couple of broken ribs and a broken nose. Sarah was relieved that he was okay, but was worried about what Graham and Beckman would say. She was hoping with all of her heart that he wouldn't be put in a CIA facility or anything of the like, and she hoped that her face was showing no trace of her inner struggle.

Finally the trio arrived together. "Is he okay?" Ellie's face was full of worry for her brother.

"He's fine. I am so sorry," Sarah said.

"What happened?" Awesome asked quietly.

She explained the story as best as she could, then mentioned the part about Casey coming.

"Can we visit him?" Ellie asked.

Sarah looked down. "Yes. He's unconscious, though. But I thought you should be he first to see him."

Morgan merely nodded, his face white. He hadn't said anything since Sarah had called him.

Over the next hour, they all took their turns to visit Chuck. The others would be busy comforting each other (except for Casey who just sat in the chair and either nodded or shook his head to whatever everyone else said), especially Sarah, who spoke only a little more than Morgan. Unfortunately the only thing for her to look at besides Chuck's family and friends was the white room. Ellie kept telling her that she did the right thing and it was good she hadn't stayed to help Chuck, since then they would both get hurt. It just made her feel worse. It was understood that she had to lie for her job. It was understood that she could not protect Chuck at all times. It was understood that she still had saved him. But the fact that a completely innocent man in her care had gotten injured-enough to go to one of those retched places that she hated even though they had saved her life numerous times-still hurt. And not only was this an innocent man, but this was Chuck. Why couldn't he live a normal life where he didn't have to worry about spending a few minutes in the park.

Finally Ellie came out of the room announcing that he had woken up looking right at Sarah. "He asked for you."

Sarah nodded and got up and entered his room-it had two beds, although the other one was empty. And guess what color it was? She was really starting to hate white. It was too plain, too everything-is-fine-even-though-its-not. She shook her head. She wasn't here to analyze colors, she was here to visit Chuck Bartowski. "Chuck?" she asked.

He opened his eyes and broke out in a smile. "Hey Sarah…"

Sarah fought to keep her face professional. "I'm really sorry, Chuck. That this happened."

He nodded. "Thanks for saving me. If you hadn't picked up, I don't know where I would be. I didn't even know if you had picked up or not."

Sarah didn't say anything.

"This has been happening a lot more lately, hasn't it?" Chuck asked. "Me almost getting taken. Almost getting killed."

"Unfortunately yes."

"They're not going to put me in some facility with no windows, are they?" His face was fearful.

"You know I'll try everything I can to make sure that doesn't happen."

"But then again, dying would be better, I think. Then I don't have to miss anyone." Chuck was staring hard into her eyes.

He had gotten her again, Sarah thought as her face became completely unprofessional. She rested her hand on his.

"We're trying to catch Menza. We have a lead, so we should be able to get him soon. You'll be fine."  
"But it's not only him. What about Fulcrum?" As he said this, his voice became raspier, and he pointed to the cup beside him. Sarah gently tipped the water into his mouth until he was able to talk again.

"Hurts to talk, to breathe…"

"Then you don't need to."

"I want to."

"Ellie told me you asked about me."

"I wanted to make sure you were okay. You had some scratches on your face."

"I don't think you were in any condition to worry about me. How did this happen?"

"I don't know. One minute I was in the park eating a sandwich and then…someone attacked me."

She nodded. "You'll have to be questioned later, but for now you should just rest."

"Look, I don't want things to be so awkward between us. I know they already are. I know you're not in the position to date an asset. I get it. It's too hard. But sometimes I just need a sign that you care, y'know? I mean, if you do…" His eyes started to close. "If you don't I understand…"

Right then, he fell asleep. Sarah sighed and made sure she didn't look too emotional before going back out. Everyone looked at her expectantly. "He fell asleep," Sarah said. "The drugs probably took care of him."

They all nodded. "Why don't you get some sleep, Sarah?" Awesome said sympathetically. "You look horrible, no offense."

She nodded. A little more than a forty-five minutes later, Sarah stepped into bed. However, sleep escaped her. All she could think about was her and Chuck, as she stared at the goddamn white walls of her apartment.


	7. Visiting Hours

I know it's shorter than usual, but I just wanted to keep the story moving. Here's chapter 7:

* * *

Chuck opened his eyes. There was Ellie, Devon, and Morgan talking. It was weird. Every time he was attacked or kidnapped, it made him appreciate them that much more. He couldn't live without them, even if it was in a bunker.

"Hey guys…" he managed to say softly. His throat was extremely dry.

"Chuck." Ellie's face lit up in a smile. "I'm so glad you're okay."

"Wasn't so long…since you were…" He cleared his throat. "Since you were here. Water…please."

She fed him some the same way Sarah had, and finally his voice was back to normal.

"Hey guys…Morgan, you look like you just saw a ghost."

"I'm glad you're okay, buddy," his best friend replied.

"I'm glad I'm okay, too." He looked around. They all had fearful looks on their faces. "I'm fine, see? Just a little tired…I guess that's the drugs. Why, is something wrong?" He became panicked. "Is Sarah okay? She was fine before, but-"

"Calm down," Ellie said soothingly. "Everything's fine. It's just…we're not used to this. You haven't gotten hurt in a long time. Not to go to the hospital, anyway. We…we didn't know if you were okay or not. What you did was brave, standing up to those guys and helping Sarah. She and John were here before, but they left."

Chuck almost laughed. Him saving Sarah…? What a joke. He didn't even know what they were talking about, but it was obviously some cover story Sarah forgot to mention. Oh God, he thought as he remembered their conversation. Chuck had done it again. Let his guard down; be vulnerable so that she could just rip him to pieces. It was the drugs that had let him be so open, he was sure of that. Well, that plus the fact that he wasn't thinking rationally anyway since the accident.

At least she hadn't been hard on him, interrupting him to say that that was impossible, she felt nothing for him, and all of that stuff she threw at him. Chuck sighed. Okay, he had to admit that she must like him a little bit. You wouldn't kiss a guy when you hated him if you didn't have to. But she honestly didn't need to throw everything in his face when he opened up to her. Wow, before this whole thing even started, if you had asked Chuck what an emotional roller coaster was, he probably wouldn't know. But now it was his life.

"Guys, I think we should go home and rest so Chuck can have some rest time," Captain Awesome said. "He looks a little out of it."

Half of him silently agreed. He was tired as hell, but the other half wanted to be with them at all times, in case something happened to him again.

"I agree," Morgan added. "See you soon, then."

"Wait," Chuck said. "Before you go, what's the damage?"

"Some broken ribs and your nose is broken," Awesome answered. "You'll be fine."

"Yeah, except your nose is kind of-" Morgan started, but was interrupted by Ellie.

"Let's go, Morgan." She turned to Chuck. "I'm glad you're okay. I was so worried…but I'll see you later, okay?"

Chuck nodded and gave her a hug. He watched as they walked out the door, and that was one of his last thought before he drifted back to sleep. He dreamed of a life without the Intersect, without the secrets, but of course he still had Sarah. After all, it was a dream, and in dreams anything can happen.


	8. Conference

ATTENTION:

1. Okay, so for a while now I've decided that I really don't like the penname want2stayakid, so it's been changed to kayla101blue. For anyone who has not noticed and wants to look me up…well now you know.

2. Very sorry for the long update (I say this way too much). I've been extremely busy lately, and I haven't even been at home for a lot of the past month. Hopefully once summer officially starts I will be posting a lot more.

--

Sarah showed up at Casey's doorstep at exactly 3:58 PM wearing the same black dress she had worn the night that she decided to stay with Chuck instead of going with Bryce. That had been one of the hardest decisions in her life. As much as she liked Chuck, Bryce had that-risky feeling that she, as most spies did, loved. But luckily she had realized that life was about more than risks in time to ignore Bryce's phone call.

She knocked on the door, and stepped in when Casey opened it. At exactly 4 PM, Casey's TV flickered on. There sat Beckman and Graham, looking grim as usual. Graham had called her about an hour ago, scheduling an emergency meeting. Now all four of them sat staring at each other.

"We need to discuss the Intersect," Beckman started.

Sarah fought to keep her face professional. Unfortunately that had been happening a lot lately, especially when it had to do with Chuck. "What about him?"

Graham continued. "Mr. Bartowski has recently been endangered more and more. You both know how vital the safety of the Intersect is. The most important thing is that he is not captured, or killed. Until the Beta Intersect is ready, his safety is one of our top priorities."

"Does that mean he's going to a bunker?" Sarah asked.

"Out of our options, it seems to be the best. If not now, definitely when the Beta Intersect is done. We are still discussing if his memory retaining capabilities can be useful to us later."

"So you're going to recruit him?" Casey asked with a little bit of amusement in his voice.

"That is still to be decided."

Beckman continued. "We are going to transfer Bartowski to a secure facility soon. Most likely in a few days, once he is in a healthier position."

"So soon?" Sarah asked. Her mind was racing, her world spinning out of control. Even the thought of not being with Chuck anymore was making her dizzy. How could she handle leaving him and going straight to another assignment? Sarah feared that she would end up messing up on the next mission. It had started to get harder and harder to keep concentration in recent assignments. Instead she felt herself wondering if Chuck was okay, where he was and the like-and it wasn't only because he was her job. The thought that this random man could come into her life and completely change her terrified the agent.

"Walker, is there something wrong with these plans?" Beckman reluctantly asked. "Is there something we should know about the Intersect?"

She thought about arguing of how Chuck had a family, and how he was a good person and didn't deserve something like that. But then she would be questioned about why she suddenly cared. These situations had never bothered her before. Instead, Sarah sat there with a blank face. "No. I just thought that there would be more time for us to examine the Intersect and see what he's capable of."

"We can well do that in a CIA facility," Graham said. "There are people whose jobs it is to study him. The NSA has agreed-a CIA facility is where he will be temporarily hosted. After that, we don't know."

Casey and Sarah nodded.

"Dismissed," Beckman said.

They both turned around and began to leave, before they heard a voice. "Agent Casey, we'd like a word with you."

Casey stopped, and Sarah continued on. She was curious about what her superiors had to say, but she was too busy trying to keep her mind straight. In a few days, the trio would be separated. She wouldn't see either of them again; at least in the foreseeable future. The Bartowski family would be devastated-so would all of Chuck's friends and co-workers. What would they say to explain him leaving? Sarah guessed it would be a death, a long trip or moving would be too complicated-too many loose ends.

She leaned over the fountain in the courtyard, being held by her hands. As she breathed heavily, she began thinking about her life in the past years. Everything Sarah had ever known was CIA, since they had recruited her soon after college. Every other man that she had met-besides Bryce, of course, were just civilians that she could manipulate, seduce-whatever the job required. She was never emotionally attached to them. Chuck-well, he was a different story entirely. Sure, she _could_ seduce and manipulate him, but it would rip her emotional world apart. Right there by the fountain, Sarah finally admitted what had been gnawing at her mind. She was in love with Chuck Bartowski.

--

Casey turned back to the television screen, his hard face showing no emotion. He waited for his superiors to speak.

"Major Casey, this information is not to be passed on to anyone, especially Agent Walker and the Intersect," Beckman said.

Casey nodded.

"Contrary to what we said before, the Intersect is to be terminated after the Beta Intersect is complete. A CIA facility is a good choice, but this way it is easier for us. There is no need to hire a whole set of guards for someone unneeded."

"Why not tell Walker?" he questioned.

"We have reason to believe that she may be getting emotionally attached to the Intersect. We don't want any…complications. You are a natural born killer-you will be required to terminate Bartowski."

So they could tell, too. But what Casey wanted to say-what they would dismiss, but he knew it was true-was that if they terminated Chuck, she would crack. Every agent did it sometime, if they didn't quit beforehand, but Walker was too connected to her work to quit-or so he thought. You can never tell for sure.

Bartowski had had an unwanted effect on him, making him question his lifestyle and whether the NSA was a good choice for him. The killing part was meant to be a compliment, but Casey was starting to have a hard time with it.

_Damn that kid. _

"I understand." Would he really kill Chuck? For some reason, he could not see him pulling the trigger on Bartowski; ruining the lives of his family and friends.

Graham nodded. "Dismissed." The screen went blank, and suddenly Casey had a huge headache. He took some Advil and looked through the window. She was breathing heavily over the fountain. Had she been there while he talked with Graham and Beckman? Surely she couldn't have heard. No, he had made it so no one could listen in when he moved into the apartment. Something else was bothering her. When he saw her walk away, Casey shrugged it off and went to sleep.


	9. Bad News

Nothing makes my day like people giving reviews. Thank you to all who did.

This chapter is angsty, sorry.

* * *

Sarah entered Chuck's room, Room 103, and came straight to his bedside. He was looking much better than before, although his nose was a tiny bit crooked. Currently the patient was sleeping, his light snores filling the room. Strangely she had only seen him sleeping once, when he fell asleep during a movie. She loved watching Chuck sleep. Even while he was unconscious, he still looked so peaceful. In fact, she loved everything about him, from his silly Nerd Herd outfit to the goofy grin. Ever since she admitted to loving him at the fountain, only a day earlier, Sarah couldn't stop thinking it.

It made it that more heart wrenching to do what she was about to do.

Unfortunately, she had to wake him. From that peaceful slumber to something that he could never forgive her for. Sarah looked down at him, her eyes full of sadness. No, she would let him sleep a few more minutes. Let him have a few more minutes of a normal life.

She studied him, then. She studied his features, trying to memorize them. From his long eyelashes to his broad hands, from his snow slightly crooked nose to his soft lips. Sarah tried not to think about how painful it must have been to receive those scars on his face. She was used to the pain, being an agent, but to a civilian like Chuck it was probably a lot to handle. And it was her fault. She wasn't there to protect him when he needed her most, and if he had not called her when he had, Chuck might be being tortured, or maybe even dead.

Sarah shook off that feeling and decided it was time to wake him up. It was better for him to know he was leaving and purposely spend more time with friends and family. No one else was there. Ellie, Devon, Morgan, Casey-they all had to work.

Sarah gently shook him, trying to wake him up. Chuck groaned and turned around in his sleep.

"Chuck," she whispered. Wait-why was she whispering?

He stirred but didn't wake. A slight smile appeared on his face, which made Sarah unable to tell whether she was glad or unhappy. She would probably never see him smile again-Chuck would be too upset-but Sarah loved that she had that effect on him.

Or maybe she was just overanalyzing. It probably wasn't her voice that had made him smile. It was probably just some dream he was having. She said his name louder, and finally Chuck opened his eyes halfway.

"Sarah," he groaned. "I'm tired."

"Chuck," she said. "Wake up, it's important."

He opened his eyes fully and propped himself on his elbows. His hair was even more mussed up than usual, and she couldn't help but think it looked good. Sexy, even. What would it be like to wake up in his arms and see that tired face? Wonderful. And more than once? A dream come true.

Goddamnit, she told herself. Get a hold of yourself.

"What?" he asked, seeing her serious. There was something in her eyes-something that made him want to grab her right there and comfort her. Something was seriously wrong.

"Chuck, it's important." Sarah waited for him to fully awaken before delivering the bad news.

"Chuck," she couldn't stop saying his name. "I don't know how to explain it…"

Sarah couldn't help herself. In a matter of seconds her face had crumbled, leaving her extremely vulnerable. Her face showed sadness, nervousness, and desperation.

She didn't need to say it. Chuck knew. In the same amount of time it took for Sarah's face to change, he shot up. Immediately he regretted it, and felt his chest hurt. "But…but…Sarah, you don't mean…?"

She nodded, her eyes glistening.

"Underground?" he whispered. Chuck wanted it so badly to be a joke. It would be a cruel joke, but at least then he would be relieved. This…this was his worst nightmare.

She nodded again.

"But we were finally…" They were finally starting to admit their feelings for each other(he was sure now that she had _some_). He was getting so close to breaking down that wall she had built up over the past years. He couldn't leave now. He wanted to tell Sarah he loved her. It was true, ever since that kiss. But now it would make the situation even worse, causing more despair of what could have been.

And what about Ellie? And Devon, Morgan…oh God, Morgan. His best friends depended on him and he depended on him. Even in the worst of times, Morgan was always there to be a buddy. Chuck's face twisted in pain. "No…" he whispered. This had to be a dream. He was desperate for it to be a dream.

"Chuck, I tried. They wouldn't listen, I couldn't show that I had become attached."

He was so upset that he couldn't even be happy that she had just admitted she liked him. He was too busy trying to make sense of everything. Chuck tried to not cry, but his eyes were already red. "This happened to fast. There has to be some other way. What will you tell everyone? Sarah, Ellie is my life. Same with Morgan, Devon, the Nerd Herd…you. What will you tell them? Please don't let it be me dying…couldn't you tell them the truth this once?"

Sarah shook her head sadly. "I wish I could. Chuck, I wish I could take this all back. Go back to before. I even wish you had never received the Intersect. That way we wouldn't be in this situation."

The world was suddenly spinning. Life hadn't been the best, but at least he still had everyone he cared about. Chuck lay back down in the bed, in case his body decided to faint, which often happened in overwhelming situations. "When?" he asked fearfully.

This was the worst part. Sarah sighed, gathering courage. "A few days. When your condition is more stable."

Chuck buried his head in his pillow. Sarah watched him, wanting to do something, anything, to comfort him. But it was useless. Nothing would help.

He mumbled something, but it got muffled by the pillow. When Chuck realized that she couldn't hear, he raised his so that he could see her face, which was contorted in pain and covered in tears. "Please…just go," he choked out.

The words hit Sarah like a bullet. Out of the reactions she had planned out, Chuck sending her away was not one of the ones she expected. She thought that maybe he would want her to stay with him. But now she realized that that was just her heart's wishes. Sarah nodded, her eyes brimming with tears, and walked out.

She stared through the room window and watched Chuck turn away from her, to face the opposite wall. She couldn't see his face, but it was obvious from his body movements that he was sobbing. It was then that Sarah let the tears let loose.

* * *


	10. What now?

Short, I know, sorry about that.

--

"Chuck, look at me."

No response.

"Chuck, that's an order. Look at me."

Sarah didn't mean to, but her voice sounded harsh, without emotion.

Chuck raised his head slowly from the pillow and looked at her. His eyes were red around the edges and looked tired, like he hadn't gotten any sleep. He was glaring at her now, his eyes filled with something like hate, although she was sure that deep down he knew it wasn't her fault.

"What more could you want with me?" Chuck said softly, although still with fierceness. "What else could you people take away from me?"

"You know I didn't want this…"

"How am I supposed to know that, Sarah or whatever your name is? You're CIA, trained to do everything with no emotion, or fake every emotion you have. How could I possible know if you really care about what happens to me? You never gave me a sign or anything besides what was needed to get me to trust you."

She had to admit that he had a point, but the words stung. She had given him barely anything, yes, but there were still those times she'd let her guard down for him.

But as she thought this, Sarah realized that she was thinking too much like a CIA agent. Chuck was a normal guy; he wasn't prepared for barely anything real. Life was black and white for him, and she was so in-between…she wondered how he could handle it.

He saw her face crumple. She knew he was right. This was when he saw his chance, for a bit of truth. "I want you to tell me, Sarah. What are your true feelings for me?"

"Chuck, if I lied to you, it would make you angry. If I tell you the truth, it'll only make it worse. I…I don't know what to tell you."

"Tell me the truth. Maybe when I'm in my cell I can think back to how at least…at least something was real, right?" His face softened. "I guess…I know that this isn't your fault, but you're the only person I have to blame."

Sarah looked down, then up. Down then up. She couldn't get her eyes to rest on Chuck's face. She struggled and finally met his eyes. "Chuck, I fell in love with you. I…I don't know how else to explain it. I'm compromised; I have been for a while. And now I just wish that we'd had more time before I got reassigned."

She took a deep breath. "I tried talking to Beckman and Graham, but they say there's no other way."

Chuck sat up in his bed and pulled her toward him. Their lips crashed into each other, and finally, everything felt like it would be all right, even though both knew that it wouldn't be. They pulled apart and with one look into each other's eyes, they captured each other's lips again. After a few more kisses, he sighed, looking down. "I just can't believe that this is happening so fast."

"I know." Sarah began shaking. "I wish you'd never been sent that e-mail."

Chuck brought her close and held her there, trying to calm her body. "I was in a rut. I couldn't get a date; I was dwelling on the past…that e-mail helped me, Sarah. As much as I want to say that I wish I hadn't gotten it, without the Intersect I'd still be that hopeless guy with no plan for his life."

"Do you love me?"

"How could you even ask? Sarah, I've been head over heels for you since we first met, and I guess I realized that it was even more after that kiss about a month ago."

"Only a month? It feels like so much longer."

There was a knock at the door, and then Casey walked in, silent. No comment about how they were holding each other, no grunt, nothing.

"Casey, what is it? Just tell us."

"I got the call from Beckman just now. You're leaving tomorrow."

Chuck was thrown off his feet. Tomorrow? It was already noon. That meant…it could be less than twenty-four hours left with everyone he loved. "Tomorrow?" he choked out.

"Casey, are you okay? You look sickly," Sarah said. "Look at me."

He raised his head slowly. "They want me to kill him once the Beta Intersect is done."

"What? Why wasn't I alerted of this?"

"They knew you were compromised."

Sarah looked at her and Chuck cuddled together. She was now on the bed with him, since it was easier to be closer to each other. They silently figured that with the little time that they had, they wanted to be as close to each other as possible.

As Casey's words sunk in, she couldn't help it. Sarah put her head in the crook of Chuck's neck and began to cry. Once she had a reason to cry, she began sobbing for everything that she could think of. Chuck held her close, feeling the jerking of Sarah's body.

"Maybe it's for the best," he tried comforting her, tears threatening to well up in his eyes. "I don't have to live underground for so long… I don't have to miss you or Ellie, or…everyone else. And Casey, I don't want you to get in trouble. I'd rather it be you than someone I don't know."

Casey made no remark about how all this mushy stuff was killing him, and instead sat in his chair looking down. He was also compromised, but not like Walker. The kid had gotten him to feel attached, to want something more in his life. How could one human being break down the walls of some of the toughest people on Earth? It didn't make sense, but it happened.

Sarah raised her head. "Don't say that," she whispered. "Please don't say that. You're the person who least deserves to die and you know it."

Chuck didn't know what to say. He wanted to comfort her, but he didn't know how. Saying that everything would be okay was a straight out lie, and saying it was for the best was what he truly thought. However, it made Sarah even more upset. He didn't know what to do, and ended up just stroking her hair.

A brunette nurse entered. "Visiting hours are over, Mr. Bartowski. It's time for you to rest."

"She's staying," Chuck said, not backing down. For the rest of the time here, Sarah would be with him at all times. He couldn't get Ellie, Morgan or Devon to come and stay with him all night, first because there wasn't room, and second because they would question.

Elaine Hampton stared at the couple on the bed, then at the man sitting in the chair, his head in hands. Something was wrong, she could tell, but at the same time knew it was none of her business. Chuck was one of those patients you wish you had more often. He was sweet, charming, and completely understanding. In the past few days, she found herself telling Chuck about her life, and asking him for advice, which he readily gave. He'd heard about Sarah, but hadn't really seen her yet. She was beautiful, and lucky to have a man like Chuck. She sighed, wishing she could find her own man like that.

Still, rules were rules. "I'm sorry, but I can't allow…"

"Elaine, please. I'm begging you." He was so desperate, so sad. What was going on? She knew that when he was admitted, there was something about national security. Did it have something to do with that?

Casey, watching, showed his NSA badge. "She's staying."

Elaine nodded, secretly thankful that she had a reason to let the two stay together. They were so cute, and the way he looked at her now…

"Best to get some rest, Chuck."

John Casey walked out of the room; glad he was able to escape from the drama. He was glad that he'd told them of his orders, the two deserved to know and be prepared. And Chuck had told him to do as he was told…still, if there was a different way, Casey promised himself that he'd find it in the next twenty-four hours.

Sarah mumbled a thanks you to the nurse, and pushed herself even closer to Chuck. The bed was small, so every part of their bodies was touching, not that either minded. Somehow she became comfortable enough to fall asleep, for the second time in his arms.

--

About the second time thing, as I said in the third chapter, once when they were watching a movie, she fell asleep in Chuck's arms.

I feel like I was out of it while writing this chapter, so tell me how it is

**Oh, and most importantly, I'm lost when trying to think of a proper ending. I have one idea, but if you'd like to help me, please, any suggestions will help.**


	11. No Goodbye

I actually have a reason for lack of update this time! (instead of the being lazy one). I had MAJOR writer's block, and it took a few days to get over. I'm dedicating this chapter to those at the board, especially BillAtWork, who had the perfect solution to my writer's block.

As of now, scrunchful is a word.

--

"Walker, get up."

She was being jostled awake by some unknown force. Sarah groaned, not wanting to get up from her current position of being curled up to Chuck. He was so comfortable, so warm…like a heater. His arms were around her back, holding her against his chest, the top of her head against his chin.

"Walker."

She opened her eyes and peeked out. Casey was standing in front of her looking impatient. "Walker, get up _now_."

He got her attention and she stood up, jostling Chuck when she sat up so that now he was starring groggily up at her, his hair looking rumpled and oh so adorable. She wanted to run her hands through it so badly, but then she noticed that there was barely any light coming in through the window. Looking at her watch, she realized that it was around six AM. That's when it hit her. Chuck was leaving today. Was Casey taking him now? She gripped him tightly, refusing to let go. Casey, sensing her distress, said, "Don't worry, Walker. I'm not taking him." He talked slowly and quietly, and that was when Sarah realized. He was trying to find them a way out of this.

Case threw some jeans and a T-shirt over to Chuck, and ordered him to change. Quietly, he got up from the bed, leaving Sarah feeling the empty space where he'd just been. She looked up at Chuck and their eyes connected. Feeling the love that radiated from his gaze, Sarah smiled up at him. His stare was so intense yet so soft. She almost ran up and jumped into his arms right then, and said screw it, let's run away together. But that was irrational; you needed a plan to run from the entire country.

"Uh…" Chuck started, his face turning red. "Do you guys mind turning around? This hospital gown they give you isn't really…yeah."

Sarah rolled her eyes, an amused smile on her face. She understood that he was shy about his body, and in a way it was cute. She was never really into the shy, nerdy guys before him. It was always the popular one, or the sporty guys who always knew what to say. But they did as he said, and soon he was wearing a short-sleeved brown shirt and khaki pants, trying to deliver an apology to Sarah through his eyes. _It's just too early_.

"Okay, look. I'm supposed to bring you in to the facility. You guys are going to be in the car, and we're going to take a pit stop. That's when you make your break. I'm inside, the car is rigged, and it goes boom." He narrowed his eyes at Chuck. "It seems whenever a car is blowing up, Bartowski, you seem to have to do with it. Take this backpack; it's got all of the stuff you need to make a clean break. Charles and Sarah Wesley. Got it?"

Both nodded.

"Listen, it's been nice working with you two. I'm going to get my ass kicked, but I figure it's better than…well, I couldn't bring myself to shoot you, or bring you down there while you keep screaming for the normal world. Hate to say it, kid, but you stuck on me."

"Thank you, Casey. That actually means a lot. What about Ellie, Morgan and Awesome?" He was almost too scared to ask. Chuck realized that he would probably never see them again, but to hear the words would be even worse. Unfortunately, his fears were true.

"Sorry, Bartowski, this was the best I could do. You'd lucky you're not going underground…unless you get caught."

He looked down and nodded. When Chuck stared back up into Casey's eyes, he saw the determination on the nerd's face. "Can I leave them a note?"

It was a challenge. Casey knew the danger extent of leaving his family a note. It was evidence; evidence that Chuck and Sarah were still alive, and in case anything happened to them, they would know. Likely the apartment would be on surveillance for a while (to make sure that they were in fact, dead) and it would cause Devon and Ellie to have to act everywhere inside the house, and they might slip up. However, Casey was shocked at how deep Chuck's gaze was. Unlike his usual goofy self, Bartowski's gaze was so penetrating that it even intimidated _him._ So he ended up telling the truth; neither yes nor no. "I'll see what I can do."

Chuck nodded. He would take what he could get. Grabbing Sarah's hand and giving her a reassuring squeeze, he listened to the rest of Casey's plan with an appreciation for the man who was going to save him from a CIA future.

--

"Shit. I'm almost out of gas," Casey grumbled while he looked at the gas gauge.

"What do you mean, 'out of gas'?" Sarah exclaimed, pulling away form Chuck's arms. "Didn't you fill it up when we left?"

"I did. Must be this damn car…"

"How much is left? I can't believe you would overlook--"

"Ah shut it, Walker. We have enough to make it to the next stop. Now leave me alone before I handcuff your boyfriend like I was supposed to."

Sarah nodded, satisfied with his answer, and snuggled back into Chuck, who began stroking her hair while she played with the curl that fell on his temple. She sighed contently, causing Casey to roll his eyes. He drove into the left lane, which began curving away from the long road. Soon they were stopped at a nearby gas station, connecting the pump to the car.

Casey looked back into the vehicle after sliding his credit card through the slot. "I'll be right back. You two better be here when I get back." He looked at them, trying to get the message across. Satisfied that the two weren't complete idiots, he knew that they understood and began walking toward the small store.

When he came back with a pack of batteries and coke, counting the change, they were gone. The words that came out of Casey's mouth were "Damnit", but inside he was grinning. He pulled out his cell phone and was about to press the button to blow the car up when he noticed the white envelope sitting on the steering wheel that said _Just in case_.

--

Chuck breathed a sigh of relief as they watched Casey see the note and pick it up. Hopefully it would be sent to his sister and soon-to-be-brother. He looked over at Sarah, completely silent, her eyes trained on the ball of fire where the black sedan sat moments before. He quietly put his dirt-covered hands on Sarah. She looked at him and smiled. After the car bomb was set off, she motioned with her eyes that it was time to leave. Chuck silently followed Sarah through the trees and underbrush, their hands connected. The backpack rattled on his back and Chuck wondered what was in there.

They walked silently for a while (he was unable to keep track of time). Suddenly, in the middle of a field, Sarah dropped down to the ground unexpectedly, causing Chuck to trip and fall onto her. He smiled, tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear. "Déjà vu," he said, remembering the not too long ago mission with the bomb. Was that only last week? It felt like forever.

Sarah smiled up at him, and brought their lips together. Chuck undid the straps from the backpack and let it slide over to the side. With the less weight on his shoulders, his arms were free to roam through Sarah's hair. He grabbed scrunchfuls of it, grabbing them tightly before letting go and running his hand through even more of the golden locks. Sarah flipped him over so that she was on top and began tracing kisses down his jaw line, then up, pausing to flick at and nibble on his ear. He gasped, eyes fluttering open just long enough to spot the backpack, lying ignored by the couple.

"Sarah, the backpack…we should prob--"

When her tongue struck his ear again, he stopped talking at once. His mind said that they should figure out the situation first, but his body wouldn't respond accordingly. Trying a second time, Chuck flipped Sarah back over and pulled back from her. "We should see what's in the backpack first. We need a place to stay."

She sighed and nodded. Chuck backed away from her slowly and unzipped the blue backpack. "Hey, he saved my purse!" Sarah exclaimed when she saw it. She looked through it. He'd taken out any ID that could be traced back to them, but kept the picture of her family that she'd kept all these years.

Besides that there were new IDs, a map-they were in San Diego right now-driver's licenses, passports, and birth certificates. Two plane tickets to Boston, Massachusetts, two cell phones ("Untraceable," Sarah explained), and a large wad of cash.

"Wait, there's something else," Chuck muttered while digging through the bag. Finally he was able to grab it-a piece of paper-and take it out. It was a note, and when he read it, a grin appeared on his face. Sarah looked at him questioningly and he handed it over.

_Ellie always checks spam mail_.

She peered at him, confused.

"He wants me to-well, he says I can-contact Ellie through a spam email. Ever since we were little, we would check them and see what crazy things people would say. She still does, and sometimes they're real, like those pay you for survey stuff. I could make it look like spam and contact her. That must mean he was planning on giving her a letter from me, or if I didn't give him one, tell her himself."

He stared down, going through each of the piece of papers and reading them. "I can't believe this is for real. It's just so…sudden."

He looked up at her suddenly, trying to see what she was thinking. She looked worried, but at the same time completely calm. "I know. But it's this or underground. And I couldn't let you go that easily."

She cupped his cheek moved in to kiss him, but Chuck moved away. "Sarah, how could you give up everything you've worked for for me? It just…I feel like you're going to regret it."

"Chuck…The only thing I regret is that you have to leave everyone behind. This is something I haven't experienced many times, and this is the most I've felt emotion in my entire life."

"I didn't have much choice. It was here with you or underground. But Sarah, we're always going to be on the run. At least with the CIA you had something to fall back on. Now it's…"

Sarah had placed a finger over his lips, and now he stared into her eyes, getting lost in them. "Chuck, you must not realize, then, how much I'm in love with you. There are some nights when I would just sit and cry because I've never felt quite like this and it overwhelms me. And when I look in your eyes, I forget about everything besides you. And the biggest difference between you and anyone else is that I can't imagine a life without you, dirt or no dirt." She looked down and her dirty clothes. "For now, it's dirt."

He looked at her in awe. "I can't even put into words how much I love you right now."

She smiled. "I know, because I feel the same way."

Sarah leaped back onto him and proceeded with their make out session before continuing walking hand in hand along the road, looking for a city so that they could find a place to stay. As they walked, the sun went down and brilliant colors reflected off of Sarah's face. When Chuck discovered this, he couldn't help but stop right there, pull her close and kiss her. They stood there for a few minutes cuddling while looking at the color that filled the sky. As he watched, Chuck realized that he wasn't quite sure what their plan was. But one look at the woman beside him and he knew that as long as he was with Sarah, it didn't matter. No matter what, as long as they were together, everything would be all right.

(fade to black)

--

Not really a fade to black person, but it was a special occasion.

Sorry that it's short (I think it's short). If you feel like there's something missing here, I agree with you, but I can't seem to figure out what that it. I would sit at my computer trying to figure it out, but I've heard that writer's block is sometimes caused by being too hard on your own writing, and I don't want to go through that again. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, good. Reviews are (very) welcome.

My plan is that I'll write an epilogue or another chapter, so it's definitely not done yet.


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